A God at Hand: Part II

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how the experience of infertility has shaped my understanding of who I am and who Christ is. In my last entry, I wrote at length about how tenderly and literally the Lord emphasized His abiding presence with me at a particularly trying stage in this always trying journey.... Continue Reading →

The Mother in Me

One of the advantages I enjoy from teaching online is flexibility. As long as I have an internet connection I can grade papers and answer students’ questions at 7am from a cafe, or at 11pm from my couch in my PJs. Such convenience can be burdensome at times, especially when I receive a flurry of... Continue Reading →

Re-envisioning Motherhood

We are raised with the tacit assumption that motherhood naturally and easily follows marriage (Recall the childhood adage, “First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes baby…”). And for many it does. But for those of us who struggle with infertility, the delay or complete absence of children can bring about a crisis of faith:... Continue Reading →

On Feeling Invisible

Note: This is a journal-style reflection that I wrote during a difficult moment during my journey of infertility. While it was written a few years ago, I think (I hope) that it can still speak to the hearts of those carrying the cross of infertility, and in particular childlessness (no living children) – a cross... Continue Reading →

Finding Motherhood in Infertility

My soul went groping all the past years through Searching the barren deserts, for a dream, A mirage, some foreknowledge or a gleam Of that long-waited day that should bring you. Excerpt from To D.E.C.— A Daughter by Frances Chesterton (From How Far Is It To Bethlehem: The Plays and Poetry of Frances Chesterton) When... Continue Reading →

Always Expecting

It wasn’t supposed to be like this. In fact, it was supposed to be completely different. I glance a few feet from me to the Christmas tree, decked with ornaments my husband and I each brought from “another life,” and those we share as witnesses to a union that took us by surprise. Our first... Continue Reading →

An Open Invitation

Welcome to Springs in the Desert, the home of an apostolate dedicated to spiritually and emotionally supporting women and couples as they navigate the frustration, pain and difficulty of infertility. While our experiences are each unique to us, we are women who know how deeply felt the emotions surrounding infertility are, and we too experience... Continue Reading →

A God at Hand, Part I

I don’t know about you, but the experience of infertility has involved a lot of weeping for me - a whole lot of weeping, often in strange places, frequently in front of perfect strangers and about procedures both bizarre and invasive. On a fall day in 2006, I was weeping on the floor of a... Continue Reading →

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