Sometimes, the only way out is through. And sometimes, we need a guide or a map to find our way through. After all, Frodo had Gandalf and Gollum, and Lewis and Clark had Sacajawea. It’s been my experience with my own mental health journey, too. Because of chronic illness, I do therapy for all of me: body, mind, and spirit. There’s physical therapy for my body, counseling for my mind, and of course, the Sacraments for my spirit. 

Even in 2025, however, there can still be a stigma associated with admitting we need help from a counselor or other mental health professional. People often react with fear to what they don’t understand, and some will make assumptions, whether they understand or not. Despite the potential negative reactions and hard work entailed, we owe it both to ourselves and those close to us to find the resources and professionals we need. 

St. Dymphna is the patron saint for those with mental and nervous disorders, owing to her experience with her father losing his powers of reason after the tragic loss of his wife. (St. Dymphna’s story can be found here). She is a great friend, intercessor, and heavenly guide for those seeking mental and emotional wellness. 

Thankfully, however, few of our paths will be as dramatic as St. Dymphna’s, and we also don’t need to wait for such dire circumstances before we begin our own journeys to mental and emotional well-being. Just as when traveling, a timely mental health intervention with a good, trustworthy guide can shorten the path and avoid serious pitfalls. Where would Lewis and Clark be without Sacajawea, or Frodo without Gandalf!

That said, there are no actual shortcuts – the only way out is through. Even though there are better or worse, shorter or longer paths, there remains ground to be covered. The terrain varies: my own journey covers rejections, disappointments over unmet but reasonable expectations, stalking, and chronic pain.  Just as the great explorers in both history and literature employed guides, we should allow ourselves to find a professional, trustworthy mental health practitioner. We are not expected to travel this life alone!

There is no shame in asking for help. While it’s not easy to quantify where the tipping point is between things being okay and needing help, there are some general questions you can ask yourself as part of the discernment. Some indicators include if the people around us say plainly that they’re concerned; if we don’t recognize ourselves in our actions anymore; or if our reactions are out of proportion to events. If possible, it is helpful to ask someone you trust what their opinion is on the matter: a close friend or relative, your doctor, your confessor. Find a time when you’re calm and they have time to answer properly. 

There are many Christian counseling groups, but that doesn’t necessarily guarantee a good fit between client and professional. Candor on our part is essential, as is advocating for ourselves and professionalism on theirs, among other factors. The first counselor you see may not be a good fit. Give yourself permission to look around for the right person. If you’re looking for a place to start, Springs links to several solid counselors here. 

There are no shortcuts on this journey. The only real way out is through, and that means doing the work. There’s no silver bullet, magic formula, or quick fix. It takes time and commitment. Candor and honesty are essential, with the providers, our spouses, and ourselves. Frodo didn’t reach Mount Doom in a day, or even a week, and it takes time to scale Mt. Everest, even with an experienced sherpa guide. Lewis and Clark spent a couple of years journeying to the Pacific Ocean. Reserving time for prayer and self-care is a form of service to others, and is at least as important as maintaining your car or home heating system. Personally, I make a “date” with myself several times a week, and call it my homework. These journeys are arduous, the scenery isn’t gorgeous for every step of the way, and the fatigue is real. But oh! the view from the top of the mountain, the sound of the elves singing in Rivendell, and the sight of the vastness of the ocean! 

I have chronic physical illness, anxiety, and depression. Years of pain led me to the place of anxiety and depression. I chose to ask for help after a small, routine slight by my extended family left me actively angry for hours. I mean boiling mad, not just simmering. Once I asked for help, however, I have not regretted pursuing it. My own journey actually started with a community mental health clinic, since I was in the process of applying for disability and my resources were rather limited. I received good care there, and I’m now a better wife, daughter, sister, and friend than I was before I learned to manage my condition. Eventually, I found a different team, but that was my starting point on this journey. It’s work, yes, but it’s worth the effort to be able to love God and people more fully and effectively. 

St. Dymphna, pray for us!

A prayer invoking her intercession: https://b.web.umkc.edu/bwpk4/quotes/dymphna.html

Fr. Mike Schmitz has a great homily reflecting on “the only way out is through,” resilience, faith, and how Moses was a guide for Israel in the desert: https://youtu.be/ckP9zCRzFzs?si=uX-WskUnM7kX50wJ 

Delsonora lives in Central Ohio and has been married to the best husband a woman could want for over a quarter century. She has a disability and was adopted as an infant. Delsonora loves pets, crafting, and food, and she thinks that coincidence is often a “divine hint”. Catholic from conception, she’s convinced that the faith is why, despite the prevalence of other options, she was able to be born.